Here it comes... the big 3

Well I was adequately warned. My friend Kellee told me 3 was harder than 2. A coworker, Aimee, said "Three sucks". My little boy is less than a week away from being three years old and today we had a little preview of just how much fun that is going to be. We should know better than to take an almost three-year-old to Kohl's in the evening to return pants. That isn't even something I wanted to do. It was an especially bad idea when all day long he had asked to go to Target and "look at the toys and maybe, Mommy, we can see if they are to 'spensive to buy one". Not a good idea at all. Wouldn't you know that Kohl's has toys too? And trying to be nice we let him "look" at them...Big mistake! When it was time to go my sweet, wonderful, loving, little two-year-old became this crazed, screaming monster. I can still hear the screaming, "I want to buy it!!"
My first thought, how embarrassing is this? I know that is incredibly shallow and selfish. I should have been focused on my child and how I need to correct this completely normal behavior, not worrying about what Sally Shopper is thinking of me. Well, the screaming got louder and louder. I calmly told him that if he couldn't stop screaming he would be taken out to the car and spanked. Well, I know I'm not going to spank him. It's been done before and it didn't work for either of us. I have learned that in order for things not to escalate to out of control, I need to remain calm. I am the adult and have the ability to do so. Thankfully, I remained calm and took him outside. I put him in the carseat screaming and kicking. This is not something he does often so it really caught us off guard. The screaming continued all the way back here and we put him in the bedroom (we only have one bedroom in this apartment) and told him he could not come out until he stopped crying. I did try to talk to him calmly, but there was no talking to him. We told him his Star Wars toys were going to be put away for the evening and that he could have them back tomorrow to try and behave better again. He screamed and screamed and screamed until he fell asleep. Initially I was angry that he was being so ugly, but after I realized the screaming was not going to stop, it broke my heart. His little voice was hoarse after screaming so much. I went to get him for dinner and told him we love him. Gosh being a parent is hard. If I didn't love him, I would have just given him the toy to shut him up. If I didn't care about him learning that you can't always get what you wa-ant (sung Rolling Stones style), we could have just gotten him the toy. But we do love him and we want him to learn that he can't have everything. I realize the hypocrisy in our lives when trying to teach a lesson to my son. Don't his daddy and I have everything we want? I know we don't really have everything we want, but don't we have the equivalent to our little toy at the store? Or is that big in the land of preschoolers? I don't know, but it has me thinking about my own instant gratification issues. I guess that is good. Kids should teach us a thing or two, right?
Today I also learned that I can keep it together when he goes ballistic in public. I know there will be many more of these episodes to come as 3 comes and goes. I remember acting just like that at times so we all know I was older than 3. My poor parents. What a brat! I already had everything and I wanted more? Well, now I know how that feels. Except today we did not buy it to teach a lesson not because we can't afford to. How much worse will I feel when he cries about something we can't afford to get him? It all comes full circle.
I read an article about this type of over indulgence today. It scares me to think about what we might be doing to our kids. I keep thinking back to how Maria Shriver said on Oprah that her parents taught them about those less fortunate. They didn't just talk about the less fortunate, they did things to help them. Quite an example they set for the rest of us.
I hope we can do the same for our children and ourselves. I need a reminder of those less fortunate now and again too. We all do.