The kids have been out of daycare for over a month now and both have been perfectly happy with the change. This major life change coincided with another major life change as major life changes tend to do. We are thrilled to be expecting a new baby in February! We were hoping to have another baby with just about the same age gap as between Nathan and Hannah and we were blessed to hit the exact same age gap. I think we assumed the same age gap would make things easier since we have been there and done that. Boy were we wrong so far. Life is just so different now and this first trimester has really been rough. The hormones, the nausea, the exhaustion, the mood swings...did I mention the hormones? God truly knows what He is doing when he gives us that amnesia after pregnancy. I couldn't have possibly gone through this before and then done it again on purpose, twice!
Now that I am, mercifully, starting to feel better (meaning I have good moments/days), I am feeling more optimistic about this baby number 3. I am adjusting to having the kids with me every day during the week as well. That has been very challenging for me. I no longer have days where I can clean the house and run errands without the kids. I no longer have time to exercise. I know for a lot of people with kids, this is how life is, but it has been a change for me and it has taken some getting used to. It is still taking some getting used to.
Over this last year we have also had to adjust to living in a new state, a new house, with new jobs and more traveling for Daddy. It has all been quite an adjustment and it has piled up on me over these last few weeks with all of the raging hormones a new baby brings. I have gone through a roller coaster of emotions and I know it isn't over, but I see a light at the end of the tunnel now. I am feeling less overwhelmed and more capable.
One of the big struggles I hadn't anticipated is how hard it has been to fall into a routine. I thought it would just happen because we are home all week, but I was wrong. It doesn't just happen and apparently you don't just "fall" into routines. They take work and practice. We are going to have to work to break some habits we've fallen into this fall. Most importantly is changing Nathan's bedtime routine into a healthy one because he will be going to school three days a week in the fall. I'm very glad that we decided to do afternoon preschool because I know it will be easier in February when we have a new baby, to get out of the house after lunch than early in the morning. I know it won't be easy either way, but hopefully easier.
Our adjustments are not over. I guess they never really are. Life is just a series of adjustments and changes. We can't just sit still and stay the same. I am hopeful that my hormones will start to settle down in the next few weeks and I continue to feel more like myself. For now I am just trying to take things one day at a time and focus on the good moments. I am thankful to have my rock of a husband, who, though he has never been pregnant, has the sympathy of someone who has. He is so understanding and patient with me through everything. He has filled in the roles of both Mommy and Daddy while I haven't been up to it. Even when I am starting to question my own sanity, he is aware that this is just temporary and hormonal and not me.
So I don't know how often I'll be back, but I did feel like I could come back today. I am thankful for my amazing friends and their prayers and understanding. I am thankful for my husband and my kids. And as strange as it may seem, I am thankful that these are my problems. Though they didn't always seem that way, they are manageable and there is an end in sight.
1 comment:
Hey! Congratulations on baby #3. Hang in there. You will make it through with 3, I promise. I will tell you from experience the sooner you get some basic and functional routines in place, things will smooth out a little more. The running errands with the kids things won't for a long while (please, someone, tell me when that happens!)
Start working on getting some big boy/ big girl skills in place, and that will be a sanity saver for living with 3 as well. For example: I don't carry anyone who can walk. The kids are the ones who are responsible to pick up after themselves every night before bed (and throughout the day, as well!), Maddie is learning to be responsible for putting on her own shoes everytime (with her temperament that is a learning curve that is still in the works), I have a "If you want to take it, you carry it rule" (unless it neatly fits into the diaper bag, or their is a special reason I should carry it.) You get the picture. WE are big on building self-sufficiency skills in this house. It will serve them later. And with 3, it has become a necessity.
Just remember you are not alone on this journey. Others have been where you are going, so don't be afraid to vent, ask, cry, or whatever else you need to get through.
Keep your chin up. Know that you are in our thoughts and prayers.
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