Incidentally

Friday morning at around 10:50 I got a call just as I was getting deep into sleep after working all night. I don't always answer the phone when sleeping, but for whatever reason, it woke me up. I realized it was someone calling from the daycare and I remember she said she had a couple of things to tell me. She said Hannah had been bitten on the shoulder by a friend and that the skin had been broken, but it was all cleaned up and she was "fine". Nathan had also been involved in a separate incident. He was playing outside and scratched his hand on the fence. He was also "fine". I remember the greater emphasis being about Hannah's incident and the focus being that the other child was being sent home. I remember thinking that was a bit harsh, but in my sleep deprived state, I think all I said was "okay" about 6 or 7 times and hung up. She probably was not at all impressed with my maternal concern, but let me call her about 2 1/2 hours after she has fallen asleep some night and see how coherent her responses are.
I did not rush right over to pick them up. I went back to sleep and later went for a run then stopped off at the library before I went to pick them up at the usual time. The incidents were long forgotten by the time I went in to pick them up. There was a small scratch on Nathan's hand and two tiny teeth marks on Hannah's shoulder, but neither seemed to notice their injuries. They were too excited about seeing Mommy!
So I signed each incident report as each of their teachers assured me my children had not cried long. Because I am home with my children the majority of the time, I realize that these things happen and I do not get too upset about "incidents". Judging from the defensiveness of both daycares I've dealt with when reporting these incidents, I imagine these caregivers get a lot of grief from other parents. I realize it is frustrating when our children get hurt and we can't be there to comfort them, but I just can't imagine blaming caregivers for normal every day things that happen in the lives of these little people.
If you have never read a daycare incident report, you are missing a potentially comical piece. Nathan got his first incident report in the infant room at his daycare in Plano. I kept it for his baby book, but soon realized that his stack was so large it would not fit properly in his memory book so I started throwing them away after reading each little entry. "Nathan was playing with one of his friends when his friend pushed him into the slide..." "Nathan was running with his friends when he was pushed into the wall..." "Nathan was eating with his friends when one friend bit him on the arm..."
I used to joke that Nathan needed to find some new "friends". I am not naive and I am well aware that my Nathan was not only on the receiving end of the pushing and shoving. It just so happens that when you fall below the 3rd percentile in weight, a lot of your "friends" will be bigger and stronger than you. Therefore, he was on the losing end of most of those battles. I am certain that some other children received incident reports in which Nathan was the "friend".
Hannah has had less incident reports than her brother, but she has been in daycare less time and will be completing daycare this week so she has not had the opportunity he has. She did have one earlier this year that made us laugh. It read something to the effect of, "Hannah reached out to her teacher with open arms and teacher reached down to hug her. Hannah then bit the teacher on the shoulder. Hannah was told 'NO!' and she looked very surprised". I thought it was interesting in that it hinted that Hannah had a malicious intent. You could almost read her little thoughts. They think I am just this sweet little girl giving out free hugs. Just wait until I sink my teeth into her shoulder. (Insert sinister laugh here.)
These incident reports are very formal and filled with jargon and a "just the facts ma'am" approach to documenting the every day occurrences in the lives of these little people. My job entails a similar way of documentation and I am very familiar with the politically correct way of putting words down on paper. I also deal with frustrated parents who would rather be caring for their children themselves so I understand that aspect as well. I try to be very understanding of these caregivers. They have the greatest privilege on earth, the care of my children.
I have not had to resort to incident reports around here yet. We have very similar incidents around here one hundred times a day, yet no litigation as of yet. Because I will no longer have these incident reports after this week (let's hope that in their last two days they can remain incident free), I decided to start my own version of documenting incidents and am starting with the most common. The Two Head Bump.

This incident occurs almost daily. It most frequently occurs in the kitchen or living room, but has also occurred upstairs in any of the bedrooms. It most commonly occurs when one or both children have some sort of covering placed over his/her head obstructing his/her view of the other child. However, it can occur without said covering. This incident generally results in both children screaming loudly while holding injured head with one hand and pointing an accusing finger at the other child. Generally, this incident leaves no one to blame other than the supervising parent who could possibly be doing laundry, checking e-mail, blogging, balancing the checkbook, cooking, etc and has turned his/her attention elsewhere enjoying the fact that the children are playing together. Each child is consoled and reminded that the particular behavior causing said incident is not appropriate. Witnessed by Mommy and Daddy. Reported to Mommy and Daddy. Until next time...